Lunch – Answers and Questions
I promised that I wasn’t going to give daily updates on new GAW and I stick by that promise, because noone wants to read a stream of posts that consist of me saying how much I like her and I’ve no idea if she likes me. Because you’ve all listened to that with GAW. And because since Friday’s lunch with new GAW it’s not true. But I will tell you about that lunch.
Firstly, she told me how she went on a date the night before, and this made me realise she isn’t interested in me. Not because she is dating per se, not because she told me per se, but the way she chattily talked about it. If she was at all interested, she would either (a) be a bit coy because she didn’t want to put me off or (b) be over the top to make me jealous. But she was neither of these, she was just chatting to a friend. So I sense she isn’t interested. Or perhaps because she mentioned Justin Timberlake the other day and I said I thought he was hot, maybe she thinks I’m gay. And she did lend me a girly romantic dvd, and we were talking about chicklit aswell. Not that an interest in romance equals gay, neither does appreciating that JT is fit, but you know what I mean.
Maybe this is a new thing for me – being able to pick up on her (lack of) intentions and signals. Maybe not. But either way, I know she isn’t interested. Which is fine. I still think she is quite cute (though she is no GAW) but that’s as far as my feelings for her go. Move on. (Or move back to GAW perhaps. She was wearing a top yesterday with a neckline that showed her neck and shoulders, and you know what that does to me.)
So I just wanted to explain that part so that you don’t get the impression what happened next is what made up my mind I was moving on. Because she went on to say how she told this guy how she wasn’t after a boyfriend, didn’t want to sleep with him, just wanted to go on a few dates. Fair enough. But then she explained to me that she wanted to be wined and dined, and what are men for if not for buying her dinner and drinks, and paying for her cabs?
Now, don’t get me wrong, I’m a gentleman (reclining) and I’m prepared to dip into my very shallow and poorly-filled pockets if I were to attempt to woo a lady, but I would not wish to be treated like a free credit card. A couple of dates, fine. But there comes a point that whatever your gender, you have to at least offer to pick up the bill here and there. That’s just politeness, and has nothing to do with what anyone’s sexual or romantic intentions are. To be fair though, I respected the way she told him outright.
This is why I wanted to make it clear that my interest in her had changed earlier, I wouldn’t want you thinking I was put off by the price tag that would buy me nothing. I’m not saying that buying flowers deserves a blowjob and dinner gets sex. There is no such thing as a dating price list, and I would never be so insulting as to assume there was. I still like her as a friend, I still like chatting at lunchtimes but I already knew she isn’t interested. And now I know that if she was, I’m not sure I still would be.
I’m not saying that the guys that buy her dinner deserve a return on their investment. But I do think they deserve respect, and I found her attitude disappointing. Am I being unreasonable? Have I been out of the dating game too long? Is it just that she is pretty enough that she will always be able to find a man who will buy her dinner in the hope he will get something in return? Is she being shallow or just working what she got girlfriend?