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Friday Fictioneers – Search

7 July, 2012

Yes, i know i’m a bit late, but i was out cycling, drinking and eating curry yesterday so didn’t have a chance to write. And anyway it’s 1130am GMT Saturday morning,  so somewhere on the other side of the world there is half an hour of Friday still to go.

Here is my effort from Madison Woods’ prompt. I make this exactly 100 words.

That’s where it happened?

Yeah.

So where do we look?

That way. And that way. Around. I’m not sure.

Do any of the landmarks mean anything? Give you any clues?

What landmarks? There’s the hut, there’s the horizon. That’s it.

Let’s walk around, maybe something will spark a memory.

Okay. But I can’t promise anything. I’ve forgotten a lot, I’ve had to. To move on.

They haven’t moved on.

I know that now.

Is that why you decided to bring us here?

I have one more week. I’ve made my peace. The relatives need theirs. And so do my victims.

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19 Comments
  1. Interesting, one more week of freedom, life ? Is this person on death row?

  2. TheOthers1 permalink

    Jail? Sounds like he was a bad dude. I read victims and was like, “uh oh, this guy has done something horrible ” in hindsight, it seems he’s come to terms with his evils.

  3. rochellewisoff permalink

    Kind of spooky. But maybe there’s some remorse?

  4. “… I’ve made my peace. The relatives need theirs. And so do my victims.”

    He may have realized this a bit late in life, but at least he’s thinking of others now.

    http://logo-ligi.com/2012/07/06/healing/

  5. Ohh, very interesting, trying to find the bodies…extra chilling because police ask convicts, the violent ones anyway, to do this sort of thing. I like how you develop the idea slowly, the let us realize it ourselves at the last line. Well written.

    Brian (http://pinionpost.com/2012/07/06/kyawe/)

  6. If this were one of the mysteries I read, I would be looking forward to the back story. Not overly dramatic (in an over-the-top way), just enough to pull us in.

    Sounds like you had a nice time yesterday! I’m watching le Tour right now (but no drinking and curry, I’m sorry to say.) 🙂

    • I’m not sure i want to know much more back story…
      Had a great time thanks! Now i’m watching primeval 🙂

      • All depends how it’s written. If not too graphic, it might be fine. Too many authors, particularly Americans, but others, too, have to try to describe everything and push the envelope so far it can’t even be found. I prefer restraint! I know there’s evil out there (although, thankfully not in the amount in books, on TV and in movies), but I don’t have to wallow in it.

  7. This would make a darn good prologue to something much longer. Very nice my friend!!!

    • Thank you my dear. i’m quite new to the whole micro-fiction thing but it amazes me how everyone fits so much story and characterisation into so few words

  8. I agree, there’s an interesting story here. This is a strong opening.

  9. I have a feeling that someone who leaves victims doesn’t revel in reliving the past, except perhaps at outwitting the cops, which apparently didn’t last if it happened. Nice character study of a not-nice character here. I didn’t feel his repentance, if any, was deep and heartfelt, but rather, “might I have done better if I’d picked another option?” Rather cold-blooded reconsideration, I thought. Nice job!
    Lorelei
    http://westcoastwriters.blogspot.com/2012/07/power-of-adobe.html

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