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C – Friday Fictioneers – Rockfall

27 November, 2015

Not being a Unitedstatesian, I don’t get the chance to indulge in this thing they call “Thanksgiving” and hence I don’t really know what it’s all about. But I do know that I give thanks to Rochelle every week for hosting the legendary FriFic group, and for prompting us all pictorially. This week’s pic is this one:

sandra

by FriFicin’ regular Sandra Crook. If you wish to read the flash fiction everybody else has written, click here to visit the Blue Frog. But don’t forget to come back and read mine too. And while you’re reading mine, don’t forget to find things that you didn’t like about it and then share your criticism in the comments section down below.

Right then, my words approacheth…

 

 

When I was here last, the cliffs sloped more gently than today. I remember that summer; seven years old, happily digging on the beach, chipping away at the rockface with my spade, hoping to find priceless dinosaur fossils.

The day we arrived home, the news showed the catastrophic rockfall. “Lucky escape,” Dad said. My brother told me I had caused it. For years I believed him.

That was our last holiday as a family, Dad left the following Christmas. Nobody ever said it was my fault, but I believed it just the same. That guilt took much longer to fade.

 

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28 Comments
  1. Good story.

  2. The burdens we pile on our children!
    Good piece.

  3. Beautiful piece. You never know what ‘take’ the kids put on things, and this demonstrates it with simplicity and flair.

  4. Powerful stuff, sir, it reached out and grabbed me.

  5. Dear RG,

    I can’t find fault with any of it. Good story. Oh the things we believe as children that follow us forever. Thank you for your thanks. 😉

    Shalom,

    Rochelle

  6. So much guilt! This was really moving.

  7. I think it’s perfect and I very much enjoyed the story.

  8. That’s so close to the guilt a child can feel.. The weight of rocks on tender shoulders.

  9. So clever, an emotional last two lines. Children can take the blame for things not their fault. A good reminder

  10. The things we blame ourselves for as children…
    and we still do as adults.
    Reality is a steep cliff to climb. Or drop off of.

  11. Children pull so much unnecessary weight down upon themselves. Well written story.

  12. Siblings can be very cruel, and once the guilt is there, it’s easy for young kids to blame themselves for everything that happens. C– I really like the build-up from happily chiseling away at the rock to the sibling teasing–and then the father leaving, which is gut-wrenching. It works for me on all levels.

    • Hi Frau L, thanks for reading and commenting. Im not sure if the brother in this piece was being cruel or just teasing – either way his words were taken too literally.

  13. Awww…I just wanna hug the poor lad.

  14. I thought your story was right on. Children blame themselves for things because they think they are so powerful at young ages. Sad the things we as children believe. 🙂

  15. Good story, RG. Childhood is meant to be a happy time, but it sadly isn’t always for some children. Also, sometimes other children can be hurtful. We need to communicate more with our children. Well done, RG. —- Suzanne

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