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Friday Fictioneers – Beach

19 August, 2016

Well I do believe it’s Friday again and that means it’s time for all us Frificers to gather around the fireside and swap tales. Rochelle, our hard-working leader, sent us a prompt pic as usual

wasp-nest

which this week is copyright Janet Webb. My 100 words are below. And don’t forget to click here to join us at the fireside where the Blue Frog lives.

 

I bend down, look closer at the strange object among the stones. I concentrate, try not to hear Mum and Dad behind me.

“Some day at the beach this is. It’s two o’clock already.”

I frown, study its shape, colour, texture.

“Well you’re the one who got lost.”

“At least I was ready on time. It’s always you keeping everyone waiting and the day gets ruined.”

Is it a shell? A skeleton? A nest?

“Next time we’ll go without you. Is that what you want?”

It’s pretty, I might take it home. But do I want a reminder of today?

 

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18 Comments
  1. Oh well told from his POV. Poor kid. You really feel his determination not to hear them. A sad story

  2. Nice story. I’m sure a lot of kids see this in their parents!

  3. Elegantly take.

  4. the wasp nest among the stones and that sting in the tail (tale).

  5. Dear RG,

    Some family days just don’t turn out right, do they? Perhaps a wasp’s nest would be the perfect memento for a day like that. Nicely done.

    Shalom,

    Rochelle

  6. Some of my parents most mega arguments took place on the beach, so I can empathise whole-heartedly with this one. And the construction is very effective, the switch backwards and forwards followed by the quite touching punch line. Well done.

  7. Such a sad way for the child’s lovely outing to develop. Great use of dialogue and the child’s thoughts – really shows how he’s retreated to a world of his own.

  8. I like this a lot… it tells a completely other story, and the punchline is great… wonder how he can ever grow up right.

  9. Yuk…what a life. Petty bickering is no way to live!

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